I'm not sure I truly understood the diametric pull of ambivalence before now.
I am both awake and asleep - living in day and night - desperate to be outdoors and yet also safely tucked away inside.
I'm feel emotional – isolated – I can't decide if I want people near or as far away as possible.
This experience is exactly what I thought it would be and simultaneously harder than I imagined. I'm either breaking apart or getting closer to something – and I have no idea what either look like anymore.
Is this what I set out to achieve or is this an abject failure of conceptual process?
And it's only 08:36 // (18:11 Earth time)